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Scouse Bird’s Guide to Make-Up

Scouse Bird image
MUST credit illustration: Robert May, Open Magazine

The girls in Liverpool have a unique relationship with beauty; they are so glamorous and take the utmost pride in every inch of their regime. A fellow Liverpool resident, I wanted to capture the style of the classic Liverpool girl and I thought that there would be nobody better than everyone’s favourite Twitter sensation, @ScouseBirdProbs. I asked her to talk me through her favourite Illamasqua products and the mind of a typical Scouse Bird. Over to her for now…

Rose x

A Scouse Bird’s Guide to Make-up

A Scouse Bird’s love affair with make up is a little more intense than most. Now I’m not talking about these girls with eyebrows 3 inches thick and more orange on their face than a certain airline has in their uniform cache – let me assure you these are not true Scouse Birds. More often than not they’re girls from the areas surrounding Liverpool who desperately try and emulate the look, and fail, a lot.

So what is a true Scouse Bird? She’s polished, she’s golden tanned, she’s immaculately made up, she flutters her exaggerated lashes as she swishes her very big hair – in short, she’s a fitty.

Let me share with you how to do it correctly…

Scouse Bird Make-Up Tips

  1. Taking care of the skin is a must, after all how can you paint a masterpiece with a crap canvas? Ideally this includes taking your make up off religiously, yes I’m even talking about when you roll in at 4am hugging the front door and telling it that you love it to bits while clutching a greasy pizza box. However, we don’t live in a perfect world, so at least when you wake up at 6am with the vodka insomnia, down a pint of water, peel those lashes off and give that face of yours a good scrub before you crawl back to bed crying for your mum.
  1. Purchase the right foundation. We’ve all been there, bargaining with the woman from the Illamasqua shop that we’re actually a shade darker than the Skin Base she’s recommending. All this is going to earn us is the dreaded white neck, orange face syndrome that afflicts so many. Accept your facial paleness and invest in a good bronzer for a strategic, sun-kissed look.
  1. Master the smoky eye. Even though our children will probably look back on the smoky eye with the same distain we have for the 80’s blue eye shadow of our mother’s generation, it’s the most versatile, flattering eye look. You can work it with as many different colours and combinations as possible. I was in the Illamasqua shop in Liverpool not so long ago and the assistant was rocking a blue (shock horror) and purple smoke, and my god, the girl looked fabulous. The smoke can be subtle and feminine or it can be all out in your face glam. I prefer the all out in your face glam of course! I like the Illamasqua Pure Pigment in Zeitgeist, a true shimmery black, and a dusting of Beguile just under the brow. It’s not the easiest thing to learn, but practice makes perfect so book yourselves in for a transformation.
  1. Just take a deep breath and battle through the eyeliner flick and false lash application. It’s through practising the art of an even eyeliner flick I can honestly understand what drives people to drink. You can do it perfectly for 18 days straight then all of a sudden BANG, you’ve got one up, one down, one thick and one thin. Your eyes look like they’ve decided to split up and start their own solo careers. There’s just no need. Then if you manage to get through the eyeliner assault course there’s the lash application – many a time have I had a near perfect make up application and then all of a sudden my lashes won’t go on evenly and I’ve ended up throwing a tantrum and crying that I’m not even going out now because my eyes are all gammy. Normally a vodka & diet coke, a few deep breaths and some time with a mirror away from everyone sorts that out. These things require patience.
  1. The brow. Right this is important ladies, try and stick with your natural brow shape and all you want to do is define it, not multiply it ten-fold. A brow done badly will ensure you’re the figure of ridicule for as long as photographic evidence lasts – potentially forever. I get my HD brows done professionally once a month, they are the nipples of the face after all. In between appointments I draw around the outline of the brow with an Eyebrow Pencil and then colour the rest in with a dark eye shadow and a stiff Angled Brush. The Eyebrow Cake is fab for this – I go with ‘Thunder’ which is pretty dark and daring. Finish it off with a slick of the Brow and Lash gel otherwise you’ll check your make up after lunch and you’ll find out you’ve been walking round all morning with eyebrow on your cheek. You can try and resist the ‘Scouse Brow’ BUT a heavy, defined brow is favoured by our future queen Kate, plus Vogue are saying it’s sooo in this season and calling it a ‘Power Brow’. Whatever, we started it, it’s a Scouse brow.
  1. The lips. Whether you’ve been blessed with a decent mother pucker like myself or you’ve had a bit of ‘help’ to plump up the volume you need to go daring. The Scouse look is not a shy and retiring one. I prefer a bright pink or a classy red as they go with most things. I’m loving ‘Box’ at the moment, a true deep red. No one wants an orangey red. 1. It’ll clash with your tan and 2. It’ll make your gnashers look yellow. No, just no.
  1. Finish the look off with manicured talons. The chunky, square white tip acrylic is sooo 2011 – it’s all about the polish and the nail art. An easy way to get the nail art look without heading to the salon is to use the new Speckled collection. The pastel colours look great with a tan and they give your finger tips the cute little look of duck eggs. My personal favourite is the lilac.

I could go on into hair, tan and personal style, but really, I don’t want to give away all our secrets. Tra for now.

@ScouseBirdProbs
www.scousebirdproblems.com
www.facebook.com/ScouseBirdProblems

COMMENTS

  1. Oh dear I loved this post! I think i spat my drink out at some of the comments, ‘roll in at 4am hugging the front door and telling it that you love it to bits while clutching a greasy pizza box.’ Story of my life :’).

    I’m brow obsessed, and I love defined brows, however I don’t like the brows that make you gawp in disgust D:! and yes girls, eyebrows are twins :P they were just separated at birth! x

    Thomas :) x
    http://www.pdbeau.com

    Thomas Westwood 31/03/2013 at 9:58 pm

    Reply

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